A Vision

by Randy

The first part of this page is a response to an email that I received which prompted me to put this vision in writing. I'm sharing my response because it speaks to my heart and the conditions that prompted the vision to begin with. The actual vision starts at the ***. Enjoy

I am thankful that you shared your story with me. I too struggle with pain from the past. It was not abused as you experienced, but it left emotional scars in my heart.

It is wise to be careful at this time. There are many who desire to manipulate and control others and we need to figure out who is who. I don't trust many people either and governments, no matter who's, are at the bottom of the list. Carrying the emotional weight of abuse is a hard thing. Just like you, I have lived most of my life very depressed. There were a few times when I asked the Creator why I was even here. What possible good could come out of living a life without any joy. I'm still working on that one but I feel there is a strong light at the end of the tunnel now. : )

When we experience pain our desire is to make it stop. Many times we start drinking or taking drugs because then, for awhile, we don't have to feel the pain. We can pretend that everything is all right, until the next day when the pain returns, and we either go back to the bottle, pills, or decide to face the pain and heal. It takes courage and strength to do that especially when so many around us are still hiding. How do we help them face the pain? What can we do to help? Good questions! The only thing we can do as I understand it is live our life. You see when we live our life we show them strength and courage. We show them that someone who struggled like they are, was able to start the healing process and didn't die from the pain. We show them that there is life that is truly worth living. Yes it takes courage but they can do it. Can we do it for them some how? Unfortunately not. It is a journey that each one of us must walk by ourselves. But at the same time, we have all the people that have walked down that road of healing before us to show us the way.

How do we find our courage? How did you? What pushed you to start your healing? get sober? I believe that comes in finding our spiritual connection. Reconnecting with what is sacred within our society and within ourselves. there is a paper called "The Circle" here in Minnesota and it is a paper put out by the people. In the Jan 2001 issue is an article Written by Rosemary Whiteshield about the struggles that the Indian people of the continent endure. It deals with research done by Dr. Maria Yellow Horse Brave Heart. A Lakota woman who is an Associate Professor of social work at the University of Denver. In it she talks about the distortion of Identity of the Native peoples, how it affects men and women differently, why the cycle continues, and paths towards healing.

I would like to send you a copy of the article because it may help to answer your questions about how to help your people heal much better than I ever could. Mr. Cecil White Hat who is the director of the Chemical Dependency Program at the Minneapolis American Native Center is quoted in the article as saying. "One thing in common with many who are on a healing journey is the tapping into history; not the trauma, but the thousands of years of strength, spiritual direction, inherent resiliency, and the discovery of a positive identity." "Our strength, resiliency and cultural values of honesty, respect, courage and perseverance have been passed down generationally thousands of years before the trauma began". "those are tremendous things to draw on that are a part of us, that form the core of us. Our spirituality, whatever form or way that individuals connect with their Creator, is the only thing that is larger than the wounded ness; that is what helps people and Nations heal"

If you would like a copy send me your address and I'll send it to you.

I don't think connecting with and being in nature is so very weird. : ) I relate totally to your wanting to be in nature. That’s where my spirit thrives and I feel alive. Have you ever done any Shamanic journeys? Your elders may be able to help you with that or a medicine person. The reason I bring it up is, that is one way we can connect with our ancestors like your great grandmother. I believe that the image you shared of the longhouse by the ocean and river and how it makes you feel, is part of what Mr. White Hat is talking about. Reconnecting with things as they were before the pain.

It is sad but I believe that the meanness and control the chiefs and band leaders are expressing is but symptoms of their pain. Anger, fear, depression, control, all are there to hide pain. and then we add alcohol, drugs, overeating. Anything to mask or control the pain. If they feel their life is out of control, then they lash out and try to control others. That way they can feel empowered. It is a false belief but it is there non the less. Many people believe that it is easier to do all these things than face what is our true issue. It has been my experience that doing those things only delays things. None of them truly make our life better or happier. And one day the pain will not be pushed away. if we don't deal with it when it is emotional pain then it becomes physical pain. or dis-ease in the body. we get sick. Deal with the pain the body says. If the emotional pain is dealt with the body heals, and very quickly. If not. Well… We all know where that story ends.

I wasn't sure how to write the vision and found myself struggling with how to put images into words. it is written in somewhat of a story fashion with the first two paragraphs explaining location and experiences prior to the actual vision. The actual vision starts with "after a time". I hope in some way this vision helps you with your journey.

Randy

*** There is a nature preserve about 20 miles from where I live where I like to go to connect with nature. The city is so busy and noisy that it helps me to go there. It's a large place with some lakes, marshes, prairies and woodlands to wander through. One weekend in the fall of 2000 I was out enjoying the beauty of the fall colors when a thought came to me. The standing people were showing me some important things I needed to remember and take to heart.

First they showed me that from spring to fall they are clothed in green and there is growth and fertility. It's in the fall they show us their "true colors" though because the color is there all along. It's just hidden by the green. The part that was important was that it's the same with us. Under the image we present is the "real" person in all our beauty and strength. Second, was that after the color, when the leaves stop providing for the tree, they are quickly and easily let go of. Hmmmm, if it no longer serves me, let it go, and do so with ease instead of struggle.. I thanked them for the lesson and continued my walk thinking about what I had just learned. I observed the colors and the falling leaves and walked.

After a time, sliding into a meditative state while I walked, I saw a large gathering of the people of many tribes. It was a very large group of people dancing but I didn't recognize the dance or the song from the powwow circuit. So I moved in closer to see what was going on.

I watched for what seemed like hours as this dance evolved. There were four drums present, one in each of the four directions. At first one drum spoke to the people, and the people danced and sang. The singing struck me as being very different from what I had experienced before, because everyone was singing, men, women, the dancers, and the drummers. One part that interested me was that I was hearing both high and low register singing at the same time. After that drum group finished it went to the next drum in the hoop and the dancing and singing continued that way until all four drums had spoken to the people. When the fourth drum had completed it's song, all four drums played at the same time.

The song was very sad and there were some people who shed tears as they danced and/or sang. In that moment I understood it was a dance of mourning. The people were mourning what their relations had gone through for the past few generations. All the pain and suffering; loss of loved ones, loss of identity, loss of self.

The next day was very similar, in that the process of drumming and singing was the same, but this time the song was uplifting and inspiring. I was seeing a reflection of a healed people, sharing their joy with each other and all our relations. My spirit soared as this song continued and I felt like an eagle riding the wind. Free of all that had kept me earth bound for so long.

During both days I spent some time looking around. On the first day I noticed that all the people were participating, but the second day was different. Early in the day the elders were on a hill nearby watching the dancing. There was a man near me and I asked him why the elders were on the hill. He told me that they needed to experience it through the eyes of the eagle in order to see how it all moved together. I thanked him and went up the hill to see for myself. You could see how the people of each nation danced together, and the slight variations of the dance based on their customs and style, but it was clearly the same dance. All the participants moved together around the hoop and it flowed like the wind in prairie grass, everyone in unison. The elders were all smiling and dancing as they watched the people below them. After a time, the elders rejoined the people in the celebration and I sat on the hill, enjoying the day.

As I watched the dance, spirit starting sharing with me things about what I was seeing. They said that this had all started many months earlier. There were people who were receiving the songs, drum beats and dance steps but didn't know why until the vision was shared with them. My understanding was that it started with the Lakota people, although I was not specifically told this by spirit. They in turn shared it with all the plains people, who shared it with all the Tribal Nations of Turtle Island.

The result was this gathering of all the nations in this celebration, where the first day was to represent the mourning of the past. The second day, joy was in the hearts of the people as they found themselves again, a strong, proud people, connected with all their relations, Great Sprit and Great Mystery. These first two days were just for the people as all nations shared this experience together. There were five more days of this celebration for a total of seven, where all people of all nations around the world were allowed to participate. A true expression of how we are all related.

They then told me that before this gathering, each of these tribal nations went through a period of a few months where they learned the drum beat, dance and song of mourning. Through that experience they allowed themselves to feel their own pain and in doing that they found healing. It was very hard for all the people to go through the process, because the pain of the past went to the very core of their being. Some people decided they couldn't do it because it was too hard, and some chose not to try at all. Those who went through it all found their joy once more, and learning the second drum beat, dance and song that represented their joy. It was truly an enjoyable experience with much laughter.

I hope I've succeeded in sharing spirit's truth as it was shared with me. The rest is up to the people.